The “One Book” Meme (Turned, Unavoidably, into the “Two Book” Meme)

Sorry for putting you through this. But it's been difficult “getting going” this morning, so I'm doing something entirely meaningless instead of doing something just moderately meaningless. (Thanks to Dan Wickett for infecting me with this one, by the way.)

A Spell for Chameleon (Xanth Novels (Paperback))
Piers Anthony

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So here it is. (I'll have two answers for each... one sort of serious, and one seriously snarky... snarky is kind of my MO for these things... and for most things... so it's kind of unavoidable for me to do the snark thing here. Just to make it fun, I'll mix it up and let you decide which is which.)

One Book that Changed Your Life

¼. A Spell for Chameleon. I still remember diving in to this book and coming out utterly hooked. I don't remember it happening to me before that time. Just completely enraptured by a book. Not wanting to look outside its pages for reality. I still seek out that feeling. Mostly I don't find it. Alas. ¾. You Are a Dog: Life Through the Eyes of Man's Best Friend Had I not written this book, I don't know what would have happened, but I likely would not be a very happy camper right now. Unless I wrote something better. Which I suppose is entirely possible. Rats, maybe I shouldn't have gone down this road. I feel self loathing coming on.

One Book that You've Read More than Once

¼. The Elements of Typographic Style. Really I have. No lie. Would I lie about something like that? I mean, how often does someone admit to being such an insufferable geek?

Tarnsman Of Gor (Gor)
John Norman

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¾. Tarnsman Of Gor. Rarely do I read a book more than once. I mean, life is short. There are a lot of books. But I was just the right age for this, and there was just the right amount of mystery and blood and sex... I might have even read it three times. (Though the truly honest answer is that the book I was forced to read the most often is The Magic String. I bet I could recite that one right now. The ball of string rolled all over Teletubbyland. Yikes and bother.)

One Book that You'd Want on a Desert Island

¼. This one is easy, and I don't think I should have to explain it. Build Your Own Boat ¾. Also this one: SAS Survival Handbook: How to Survive in the Wild, in Any Climate, on Land or at Sea

SAS Survival Handbook: How to Survive in the Wild, in Any Climate, on Land or at Sea
John 'Lofty' Wiseman

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One Book that Made You Laugh

¼. Possible Side Effects. Not because I have read it, but because much of it has been read to me. ¾. I don't like funny books.

One Book that Made You Cry

¼. Random House Webster's Unabridged Dictionary, Deluxe Edition (Webster's Unabridged Dictionary (Deluxe)). I used to have one of these sitting on the floor of my office, and I stubbed my toe on it. Wept like a baby. ¾. I must turn something off when I read books. Honestly, I'm having trouble remembering a book that made me cry, though I generally cry like a faucet. At almost anything. Hat dropping. You name it.

One Book that You Wish You Had Written

¼. Harry Potter. Honestly. Any book you write that means you never have to work again (or pretty much do anything you don't want to do) has meaning... is somehow significant, even if you scoff at money and earnings and whatever else... what would you do with yourself? Good question. I might raise my children. I might raise a lot of people's children. I might try to make a difference somewhere. Somehow. Just for a minute. Just sixty seconds. How good would that be? ¾. I don't have a snarky answer. That first one was real. What would you do if you'd written a book that made you richer than royalty?

One Book that You Wish Had Never Been Written

¼. Harry Potter. Honestly. How many times do I have to read this to my son? I mean, really. Can we stop now? Also stop with the book on CD? It's driving me crazy. ¾. The Holy Bible. Imagine the ways in which your life might be simpler had this text (all of it, new and old testaments) never been written down. How different would your life be? (Maybe not at all... could that even be possible?) You have to understand, as a Christian I say this with some reservations, but with all the seriousness and gaminess I can muster.

Chip Kidd: Book One: Work: 1986-2006 (Chip Kidd)
Chip Kidd

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One Book You Are Currently Reading

¼. The Essential Calvin and Hobbes. My kids adore Calvin and Hobbes. A little too much, I'd say. ¾. Beware the geek (again). Chip Kidd: Book One: Work: 1986-2006 (Chip Kidd). I suppose studying is the more appropriate word here. But reading it I am.

One Book You've Been Meaning to Read

¼. This is the hardest one to answer. Hm. Oh, got one. I actually keep meaning to buy Omnivore's Dilemma so I can read it. I think that should count. I'm going to count it.

Envisioning Information
Edward R. Tufte

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¾. Envisioning Information. Do I really have to say it? I think I've said it enough. “Geek! Geek geek geek geek geek.” I can't even explain to you why I love this stuff. It's just, well, I don't even know. It's just... cool. Okay. That's enough. I've had it. No more of these. They make me crazy. I had to finish this because I started it, but that's where my responsibility ends. You are not required to do it yourself. Just, you know, find something useful to do with your day. Like build a lap pool in your back yard. And invite me over. I love to watch other people work.

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